1 day to go

Yesterday was a productive and eye-opening day. I got up early and, with the help of my partner, completed the fitness tests. Whoa. What a wake up call!

I started with the 1km run which, didn't look too hard until I got about half way and needed to walk for a minute. I finished in 7m08s but was breathing like a rhino for a good 10 minutes after I'd finished! I felt like a baby elephant stamping down the footpath and wondered if the people in the passing cars were laughing at me, because I felt ridiculous. Oh well, at least I'm trying, right?

I then came home to complete the rest of the tests. My push-ups (knees) were ok as my trainer has been pushing me with these over the last 2 weeks. The sit and reach test was abysmal. I could barely reach the ruler, let alone my toes! The plank and the wall sit were the worst. I only lasted 15 secs on the wall sit and Michelle said a beginner should be 59 secs or less! I don't think she meant that much less. Having my partner sit there and say "what's so hard about that?" wasn't really helping :S He takes his ridiculously amazing metabolism for granted.

Then, to add insult to injury, I took my measurements and 'before' photos. Yuck. I haven't worn a bathing suit in years because I've been too ashamed of showing any part of me. I realised I look much worse in photos than when I look in the mirror, and I already have a pretty poor opinion of myself when I look in the mirror, so I felt like total shit seeing those photos. I've personally never seen the back of myself in a bikini. It was disgusting. My partner was helping me with the measurements and photos and I just started crying because I was so ashamed of how I'd let myself go :( Anyway, enough self loathing. This is why I'm doing this. This is me setting up a road block so I can never get here again. It was an emotional and brutally honest exercise.

After going out for (a healthy) lunch, I then went shopping with my shopping list because I knew I'd be spending today with my mum and wouldn't have time; not giving myself any excuses. Holy moly. So many things! It was double my normal weekly grocery bill, but when I factor in a couple of things (e.g. I won't be buying lunches or take away dinners, the condiments will last me more than one week, the menu feeds 2, etc) the cost probably balances out. So what does the week 1 shop look like?!

And that isn't even all of it! I already had some of the ingredients in the pantry. It all looks delicious and will take a heck of a lot of organisation and preparation (especially on the mornings that I train), but I'm looking forward to trying new things. A few people on the forums were whinging that waaaah they don't eat this or wahhhh they don't eat that. I'm using this to try stuff I don't usually eat. Although, I must confess, I just couldn't bring myself to eat kangaroo, so I did substitute this with beef!!

I like that I can print out the meal plan and recipes and then, if my partner gets homes before me, he can just flick to the recipe and get things started instead of waiting for me because most of the things I cook are in my head. I also like the fact that I don't have to think about what to make, what to buy, portion sizes, etc. Virtually foolproof!

One more sleep until this journey begins! I wish all of my fellow travellers lots of support and motivation. Lets do this!!!!!! 

And finally, happy Mother's Day to all of the mothers out there. I hope you have a wonderful day!